I’m pretty much fucked. Adulting sucks ass.
The transition from being a nurtured parasite to a “fully-matured” and “responsible” public citizen has pretty much fucked me up. I feel like these descriptions of what I should be at age 26 are very restrictive; they don’t allow for failure, when the truth is, our 20s and 30s is a time for exploration and fuck-uppity; our time to discover what brings us happiness and what doesn’t. Instead, we’re miserable because we aren’t any of those definitions yet.
But I’ll let you in on a secret: we don’t have to fit ourselves into these descriptions of what we should be at this age. It’s that easy. Although, yeah, I get it, it’s hard to internalize. It was hard on me, too, but what helped me actualize this was reading lots and lots of un-fuck yourself content which I’ll be sharing with you in this article in the hopes of helping you on your journey.
But first, what is Adulting?
(If you were to ask me, I’d say it’s a combination of adulthood and dying, because being here, I just wanna pass away. Kidding. We’re here to kick adulting in the ass, not get defeated by it.)
Adulting is an informal term that refer to the process of “growing up” which just means trying to conform into the standard of what expected adult behavior is like—a punctual bill payer, high-performing corporate slave, and perfect decision-maker.
This was all exciting business when we were kids, but now that we’re here, we realize getting knee bruises is so much better than projecting childhood trauma into adult relationships.
We also use the term adulting like it’s a phase of adulthood, like we’re not actually adults yet because we’re too inadequate to fit the standard so we deflect it as something we have to do (”to adult”) instead of owning it and being it.
Well, at what age does Adulting begin?
From my experience, it begins the moment you become miserable. Kidding. Maybe. But seriously though, on a personal level, I felt it when Christmas evenings don’t feel as joyous & exciting as they used to; or when birthdays stopped being celebrations; or when I didn’t anymore magically end up on my bed after falling asleep on the couch watching Cartoon Network.
If you want it in numbers, years, whatever math wizard, typical adulting starts at 18 which is the standard legal adulthood age in my country, and this varies from place to place where legal rights are concerned.
How do you deal with Adulting?
If you want the long answer of how I came to the conclusion of how to deal with growing pains, you can read this article.
Short answer? (because I knew you’d never read that article haha)
- I read a lot of books and adulting blogs.
- I take note of things that I find interesting and incorporate them into my lifestyle.
- I figure out what works best for me and tweak what doesn’t.
Now, that’s easier typed than done, but that’s what makes our 20s and 30s interesting, we have the power to explore every conceivable possibility for us to figure out the best way of dealing with adulting.
Ok, what the heck is an adulting blog? Is that a disease?
Nope. In a sense, they’re more like vaccines. Adulting blogs are like the millennials’ equivalent of a parental bartender. Really, they’re just a bunch of strangers telling you some really good advice, others really shitty, some comforting, some discouraging, and some trying to hide the desperate attempt at humor (Why are you looking at me?).
Do they help? Yes, they do.
So here they are:
32 Adulting Blogs to Read Instead
I rounded up the internet’s “best” blogs on adulting as a pseudo-adult in the 19th century. I also categorized them into major adulting categories because I’m awesome like that.
Of course I’m on the top of the list, I wrote this shit so I award myself with the gold medal hahaha
Read This Instead is a personal blog where I write about my experiences and epiphanies, sometimes I share unsolicited life lessons like a 60-year-old grandma, other times just pop culture brainrot like a 12-year-old fangirl. I try to make this space as relatable as I can because misery in our 20s loves company.
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Gentwenty was founded in 2013 by Nicole Booz and Gina Oursler where they write about navigating the real world as someone who belongs to the generation of twenty-somethings. Their blog also talks about “dispelling myths about Gen Y (and now Gen Z) while providing their peers with support and reassurance during the crazy twenty-something years” because, frankly, our twenties is CRAZY and we need all the support we can get.
3. Marah Elizabeth (formerly: Making it Millennial)
Marah Elizabeth started her blog in 2016 to talk about her passion for building a life you love. In her blog, she shares her own lifestyle choices, personal development journey, goals, and things that spark her joy to inspire you on your own adulting journey.
Why is it that we’re always apologizing for voicing out our opinion as today’s youth? Here at Unwritten, you can find like-minded millennials that unapologetically speak their minds.
The Urban Millennial is millennial lifestyle blog that explores several aspects of millennial adulting including topics like “4 Undeniable Truths About Living With Roommates” to “7 Tips for Millennials Looking to Build Their Professional Network”.
Founded by Leah Gervais to “rewrite conversation about what’s possible for twenty and thirty somethings given the passions and potential our generation holds”, Urban 20 Something also provides entrepreneurial advice as a 7-figure business owner.
Mary Agbesanwa’s blog: a millennial’s diary covers important topics on personal development, diversity, and university and workplace advice as a 20-something herself traversing the path to independence.
They talk about hard to digest adulting stuff like mortgages, estate planning, and home building where they make it real easy!
Manila Millennial is a personal blog by Ces Dimalanta who lives in Manila. She talks about her thoughts on food, travel, lifestyle, and the “day-to-day adventures of a millennial trying to break away from the common notion of this generation”.
Thoroughly Modern Millennial was founded by Ria and she considers it her personal reflection of who she is as a person where she shares snippets of her writing journey and life as late-twenties millennial living in London. She also explores hard topics like racism and sexism and uses her writing to “uplift the voices of those who are underrepresented in the World”.
11. Adulting Queen
Launched by Presley in 2019, Adulting Queen is “dedicated to the young women attempting to become the ~queen~ of their adult life.” Adulting Queen emphasizes the importance of women empowerment in the midst of adulthood hardships in the 20th century.
In Blissful Adulting, Mirah shares with us the goals, achievements, and mistakes that she’ll take in order live blissfully. Her blog explores subjects like commerce, how-tos, affiliate marketing, and saving money.
on College Life:
Because misery begins in college! Check out these blogs out for tips and tricks on surviving college, study tips, dorm hacks, and more.
14. College Cures
15. Study Hacks by Cal Newport
At one point in my ordinary life, I’ve always wanted to be “that girl”. I tried, folks, but there’s no denying that I will always be just a potato sack. So, here are some of those girls online:
18. Break My Style
One of the most frustrating yet fulfilling(?) adventures of adulting is career-building. Here are career-oriented blogs that will help you achieve your girlboss goals:
20. Career Sidekick
Dealing with finances is probably the most adulting task a person will ever undergo. These blogs talk about a variety of tear-inducing topics such as savings, investments, and everything kaching-related.
22. Broke Millennial
I had to include travel blogs because what’s an adulting equivalent of the holy grail of rewards for doing a good job as a corporate slave?
28. I Am Aileen
Bonus: My Top 3 Blogs
And again, because I wrote this article, I’m going to share with you my top 3 favorite blogs of all time.
30. Wait But Why
31. Mark Manson
32. Jen Hatmaker
Go Slay Adulting
Go ahead, slay that anxiety-inducing and despair-inciting dragon called Adulting.
Remember, it’s only hard because we’re constantly bombarded by unrealistic standards and expectations but we don’t have to be all of it just yet. Our twenties and thirties should be full of trial and error because the fool who said we can get everything perfect in one go is a yeah, a fool.
Read these blogs on adulting, learn, apply, and try again! That’s the secret to slaying the dragon.